In 7th grade, my school administered a Mathcounts school sprint round in order to select a team to go to a nearby chapter competition. Most students were under the impression that I was really smart and were shocked when I didn’t get in, which made me feel pretty bad. Even a good friend of mine, who did get in, poked fun at me for it.
Because of this, my competitive instinct kicked in, and I studied. REALLY studied. I went to the chapter round the following year with the rest of the team and got… top 40. I was devastated. The friend of mine mentioned above nearly got top 10, and I was unbelievably upset. It killed me to realize that while he hadn’t studied, there were people equally as ”naturally talented” who HAD, for years upon years. I, irrationally I know, resolved to quit caring about math after that. It killed me also because this was only the CHAPTER ROUND. The very first qualifier.
But I couldn’t. In the undertaking, despite my best attempts not to, I had fallen in love with competitive math. No… not just competitive math. ALL math. I couldn’t describe it, but the subject took hold of me, and wouldn’t let go.
It took a lot for me to get over my bitterness. Why should people get to be more successful than me when I love it so much more? I thought, how could that possibly be fair?
To this day, I’m grateful for the experience. This side of me which had previously been unveiled now showed itself like a shining star. I’m grateful for it despite how jarring it seemed at the time. I now realize skill isn’t everything, and there is more to competition than winning, than just BEING better than the others. In a complete shift of perspective, I now appreciate people for the work they put in - the nature of their success - rather than just THE SUCCESS. Because so much goes into success - circumstances, inborn talent, AND hard work.
I’m going into the 11th grade, which concludes my break from competition. My dream has always been AIME - something I understand to be a relatively low bar for a person in the competitive math scene. Heck, I might not even be able to accomplish that! But heck if I care. I’ve (unfortunately and fortunately) uncovered this love for math that I can’t escape, and in retrospect, I realized I’ve gained so much from even just that one failure. I’ve become a better problem solver, a better sport, I found my passion, and so much more. I’m so eager to see what I will learn as I continue this endeavor.
Thanks for taking the time to read this!! Have a lovely day :)
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Thanks for sharing your touching story. You had fun and learned a lot through math competitions, and the knowledge you gained would benefit you for years. You don’t need to win math competitions to prove yourself. You did it, you learned, you had fun, and that’s enough.
This reminded me of someone who told me how talent was like an exp multiplier in a video game, even if one has the multiplier, if they don't spend time on the game, their level will not increase.
It takes a strong mind to deal with all you've been through, Elyz! And your resilience and passion is inspiring!
Thank you so much for sharing your story! We love your story and we can truly feel your passion on Math.